Clay was right. The depression was short lived and while it lingered like smoke in a sweatshirt, it wasn’t overwhelming. I was me again. But by Monday, I was a new kind of wrecked. For three days I had this restlessness that couldn’t be tamed. Like mosquitos under my skin, there was a buzzing inside… Continue reading Healing with Psilocybin: The Shift
Fall 2022 I decide I want to explore psilocybin. The studies around using it for healing PTSD, anxiety and other mental illnesses is compelling and intriguing. Similarly, the research with terminally ill patients finding peace and “Oneness” was equally enthralling to me. My first plan: try microdosing. I buy some online from a site a… Continue reading Healing with Psilocybin: The Soil
I’ve always had it in my head that to have a big change in perception/habit/personality it had to be preceded by a monumental “a-ha” moment; something huge that slaps you in the face with the brute force of its clarity and resonance. But if there’s anything I’ve learned in the last year it’s that the… Continue reading What Self Love Looks Like
For the last two years I have been working on a fertility specialist certification so I can become a fertility coach. When I joined the program, my son was a few months old and I thought the workload would be manageable with an infant who slept all the time. Problem was, he never slept. A… Continue reading Doing The Work of Changing and Healing
I knew 2021 would start off on the wrong foot; 2020 ensured that. But I had no idea just how wrong it would be. I woke up one morning, blearily looked at myself in the mirror for the first time in forever and thought, “Where did you go?” I was gone. Kelsey was a distant… Continue reading But WHERE Did She Go?
For me, winter has always been about hibernation; a burrowing into ones self to reflect, relax and embrace the slow growth that comes from such hibernation. I’ve taken a break from blogging the last three weeks. I’ve closed down my small business I’ve had for 6 years and am going through the motions of dismantling… Continue reading For Every Season Comes A Change
Two months sober. Never thought I'd say that both because I never thought sobriety would be something I'd seek and because I never thought I could ever do it. To be sober is quite sobering Photo by Sora Shimazaki on Pexels.com In the two months since quitting drinking I wish I could say so much… Continue reading Two Months Sober
I didn’t realize how lonely I’ve been until this weekend. Even surrounded by my children and my husband on weeknights and weekends, I’m lonely. Even seeing some friends occasionally, I’m still lonely. I’ve spent too much time alone with myself that my brain is playing tricks on me. My insecurities are rising, my childhood programming… Continue reading The Side Effects of Loneliness
I’d been on the fence for a few years about sobriety. Could I do it? Would I do it? How? I started by committing to Sober October a few days early after a particularly embarrassing drunken night at the end of September. I told most people I was doing it to see if I could… Continue reading Finding the Answers
20 years ago, at the impressionable age of 15, I put myself in a situation that I still regret to this day. I believe I was raped. Or believed. Or believe. I’m not sure anymore. Over the course of researching and writing my book, memories long forgotten have started to surface, including some about one… Continue reading Blackout.