ONE month sober. I genuinely thought I’d never be able to say this. Even during pregnancy I’d have a sip here or a small glass of wine there. I have never gone this long sober since I started drinking at 14. Sad, eh? I’ve had this niggling feeling in the back of my mind for… Continue reading Strolling with Sobriety
I surrendered. I waved the white flag. My cup wasn’t just empty, it was shattered. All my self care tools in my arsenal were failing: the bubble baths, the yoga, the poolside visits with friends, nothing was helping me feel refreshed and content. There is at least one child who is always on me. I’m… Continue reading Waving the White Flag
When I was a little girl, I was afraid of the dark. I had a repeated nightmare of my house catching fire and everyone perishing. I’d be running frantically through the fire, dodging falling debris trying to save my family while simultaneously trying to find a way out through smoky vision and darkness. The fire… Continue reading Two Cents Tuesday: Sitting in the Dark
To say I had a good childhood would be true...until I was 12 that is. Then shit hit the fan. To protect my family who may read this and for those who know them, I'll leave it to your imagination to understand how a young girl with a bright future chose victimhood, resentment, booze, sex… Continue reading My Past Doesn’t Define Me. It Inspires Me.
A few weeks ago I wrote a post releasing my fertility journey and all of the negativity surrounding it. I no longer wanted to talk about what I had been through. I didn’t want to hear the words ‘miscarriage’ or ‘secondary infertility’ anymore. I wanted to remove myself from the online support groups, delete the fertility… Continue reading The Epilogue to My Story
If you've been following along in my (almost!) one year journey of blogging, I've had a pretty transformational year. Two miscarriages and a whole bucketload of self reflection and healing has led me to admit something that I never thought I'd say: I'm ridiculously, ridiculously happy. I've become THAT person: the one who is always… Continue reading I’ve Become THAT Person
The time has come for us to lay down the Weapons of Body Destruction and throw up our arms in Victory. You know what I mean, right? The weapons. Of body destruction. The scale is the biggest one. The diet books are another. The "get slim quick" pill. The wraps. The cellulite blasting lasers. Basically… Continue reading Fall in Love with Your Body: Release the Guilt and Eat the Damn Chips!
It was those seven words that hit me in the chest like the descent from the tallest roller coaster. My stomach dropped, my heart sped up and quite frankly, my mind was blown. My daughter meant it about the tire swing she was on but I heard a completely different statement. I was going too… Continue reading Mommy, Slow Down, You’re Going Too Fast
I have anxiety and mild depression. Just reading that sentence brings tears to my eyes. Why? Because I am filled with shame. I know shame well; we've become close these last few years. When I started experiencing bizarre and unexplainable symptoms that made me feel like I was dying, my lungs were collapsing and/or my… Continue reading The Shame That Tags Along With Anxiety
My birthday was last Friday and maybe it was the previous night's scotches or the five hours of sleep I was running on or perhaps the imminent arrival of my period but I woke up as a weepy, morose 32-year-old. Why? Most women have their worst birthdays on the ones that end with a zero.… Continue reading Why I Cried Turning 32